Anger in Motivation

Anger is not an emotion that I feel often. After growing up past the age of temper tantrums and stomping my feet, my outlook on anger changed. Anger became a form of motivation that encouraged me to move forward, and I found that sometimes I even enjoyed anger. My favorite moments of anger came from a lack of sleep, those days in which I’d spent little to no time sleeping were so fun to me; it was as if I saw everything in its true light. Sometimes I feel as though happiness blinds you to all the bad going on around you and anger allows you to see everything in its true colors. Anger truly does push me forward, and sometimes I wish I felt that type of anger more frequently.

As I was getting ready to submit this prompt I spent some time looking over what I’ve written in the last few days and noticed the decline in my volume of work. That’s something that upsets me, but it doesn’t make me angry. Perhaps if it did I’d be writing more. The truth is I’m always tired these days, and I’ve decided recently that if I’m tired and I really want to sleep I’m going to let myself do so. I have so much on my plate that I feel that I’ve earned the hour nap I’ve been taking these last few days; if I didn’t take these naps and sat down and wrote perhaps I would have more to say; however, that’s a mental battle I’ve yet to beat. At least I’m writing something, right? Even if there’s nothing I can do with this work other than share it and then discard it. It’s still better than nothing… I think.

I really do need to start journaling again.

— March