My entire family has been fighting since the day we were all born-I sometimes think everyone came out of the womb with their dukes up. Fighting against each other, the world. My mother pulling a gun on my father from the upstairs window as he banged on the door below, my mother and her sister coming to blows screaming at each other. My sister and I rolling around on the floor Yelling-screaming-fighting was a way of being, not an ideological difference. We leaned into violence as a way of life. And then, we embraced.
I wonder if this is one of the reasons why my mother and father were drawn to each other- the violence was familiar, almost like a secret pact. Or whether, like my first husband and I, it was buried under the surface of things, and they came together hoping to break the cycle. Regardless, violence becomes more and more terrifying and destructive as we move through life- exponential in its appetite.
I'd like to write about this more over the weekend. Hopefully the power and internet come back and I will fight off whatever it is that's ailing me. What a week! Still feeling committed and grateful.
— Cristine
I wonder if this is one of the reasons why my mother and father were drawn to each other- the violence was familiar, almost like a secret pact. Or whether, like my first husband and I, it was buried under the surface of things, and they came together hoping to break the cycle. Regardless, violence becomes more and more terrifying and destructive as we move through life- exponential in its appetite.
I'd like to write about this more over the weekend. Hopefully the power and internet come back and I will fight off whatever it is that's ailing me. What a week! Still feeling committed and grateful.
— Cristine
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